Bastard Guys  

Posted by Sugarking

It didn't start today. A lot of us guys can be desperate when it comes to kpekus. Some of us go after our friend's girlfriends, wives and whatever, as long as its a lady. But its the extent some guys go to, just to get some sex that's starting to be really worrying.



So I met Caroline at some Volunteering workshop about a year back, located each other on facebook, exchanged numbers and just got talking. Pretty Ugandan thing, with a lean frame, she was quite shy. Could never hold your gaze for long. But she was really sweet and had some of the best boobies I ever saw in my whole life. And for her frame!


Anyways, I had her over a couple times, and I got to er...mouth the things. But that was all she let me do, suck bobbie. Caroline would never take her trousers off, and her reasons were changing like the British weather mehn. Today she had a boyfriend, the next time she was off sex, then the final one was that she was afterall a virgin. I on the other hand was starting to doubt "her" actual sexuality. I mean, I never saw the blasted thing for one day. She let me have my fill of bobbie, but the pants just never came off. She held them up with a grip unbelievable for someone her size. Me sef didn't push.


So all these up-and-down excuses wore me out and I sort of forgot about her for a while. A long while actually. She was on my bb though and one day out of the blue, she pinged me "Wait, so did you really forget me???" lol. I don't know what it was about that ping, but I was cracking bad. We did some catching up, I asked if she wanted to come over to my new place (I moved houses), she said she was done with Uni, had a lot of time on her hands and would love to come down, and we set a date.


So the day come reach now, she pinged me early in the day to ask what stop to get off at and what time she could come. We settled on that, and she had gotten to the bus station from which she would get the next bus coming by mine, when she pinged me to say that she had a friend with her and if I would mind if she brought the friend along.


My first thought was, she suspected I was going to move to her again, and thought to pull that old "take-a-friend-with-you" trick. "friend?? What friend?" I pinged back. And she returned that the friend was indeed a guy. That didn't sit well with me one bit. A guy??? as in, your protector abi wetin? Why should I allow myself to be subjected to that? This was afterall my house, if you no wan come because you were worried, you could say so, not spring it on me on short notice that you were bringing a friend, a guy for that matter who I didn't even know. I tried to look at the thing properly to make sure I wasn't over reacting, but arrived at the conclusion that 1.) she was actually being disrespectful to do that, 2.) na you say you wan come, so you can't be doing that. 3.) I wasn't feeling the whole setup and wasn't about to put myself through any awkward situations. I actually had to remind myself that it was my house.


So I pinged her a "No can do" jare. "I don't like strangers in my space, I'm sorry" I replied. You see, if the settings was different, I wouldn't really mind. I've had my friends, bring their friends that I didn't know, and that wasn't an issue, but this one felt very uncomfortable. I just couldn't help it. She asked, if I could come meet them at the bus top then. I replied that I couldn't do that either and that she should lose the guy. Imagine me at the bus stop and I get introduced to him as the guy who wouldn't let him in his house? I didn't have to, and didn't want to. Nah, sorry hun, can't do that either.


Well, long story short, she lost the guy and finally found her way to my door. It struck me as odd actually. I half expected her to get offended and return home, but she didn't. I opened the door and she was by herself. Exchanged pleasantries and I finally got the gist. She had met him on the bus on her way to mine, and he had spun her some gist about being a promoter for P-Square and 2Face, and because she knew I do music, she thought it would be nice for him to meet me (this was my "aww" moment. The poor girl. lol), and the maga suggested that he wasn't very busy and could come with her to see me, that's when she pinged me that first time.


I couldn't understand it. You meet a chic on the bus, she manages you some face time, you spin her some bullshit, she tells you she's on her way to see some guy, and you ask if you can tag along??? Like.....guys do that really??? What were we going to talk about? P-Square??? And if we were going to have sex, we'll hand you a sit to watch?? What really wowed me the most was my man pinged her about an hour later after she got to mine (yes o, he had taken her pin sef) like "I'm done with what I came to do here and was wondering if you were done so we can go back together". The bastard guy!! Niggas are cocky o! Dude just met her on the bus!!!! and it was the manner he was shamelessly dissing me that got to me.


Anyways, she pinged him that he could find his way to wherever sha. lol. We did some more catching up, streamed a movie, and I made sure not to lay a finger on her. A week later she would admit that she found it rather baffling that I didn't move to touch her, and I explained that I was tired of the awkwardness that always followed knowing that she still wouldn't take her pants off. She agreed that I was correct, and I said "see?" lol

23 comments »

She said; "NO SEX"  

Posted by Sugarking

I did a ten week interactive course in "People Skills" , there were about 13 of us that signed up and that's that's where I met Clarissa. Her sister, Cleo, just one year older than her had signed up for the program too. Our tutor was a 52 year old lady, who broke it down for us, the basic communication skills used in relating with people either as counsellors, interviewers and even in normal daily life.




You see Clarissa was shy, ridiculously shy if I must say, very polite, and em...also very ABSOLUTELY sexy. As in period, full stop. But underneath all this lay a very intelligent mind. Our tutor, stunned by it, was always asking her what career she wanted to pursue and how she was doing in school. She was gifted. She was just 19.



Anyways, I was checking the "Recent Updates" on my bb, yeah, she's on my bb (I'm starting to be addicted to that thing. The subliminals on twitter have nothing on the bb ones I swear) and she had changed to a very revealing brand new Display picture. Omo, I hit her up immediately jare. Lemme add that this lady, for reasons beyond me considers me a clown of epic proportions. She only had to tak a glance at me and burst into hysterical laughter, let alone when I opened my mouth to her. I was the only African in the class, and I think I brought a different vibe to the class they all found funny beyond my comprehension.



"Hey Clarissa, you're looking rather wicked today, I might have to move to you finally you know? What do you think?"

And being Clarissa, she didn't disappoint with a "LMAOOOOO!"


There was more play toasting and then it came round to us talking about her boyfriend.

"Hope he's hitting it good? Cos I'm about to take you from him if he isn't" I typed, which met with more "LMAOO"s (before people begin to slag me off as cocky, I'll let you know that this is how I communicate with this here Clarissa. I'm sure we all have friends who we have these type of convos with. I am not being cocky or brash in a bad way, I'm just joking. She finds it funny so I continue with it. There's a couple other ladies I do it to also and its all for laughs. I know people who've written me off for this actually. oh well. lol).


So back to our gist jare, leave bad bele people. lol. Ehen, so she said she had a man, No, he wasn't hitting it good because he wasn't hitting it at all. "I'm not ready yet" she added.

WHAT??????!!!!!!!



So there are actually guys that go into a relationship with a chic who has a "NO SEX" clause?? Really??? As in....What do they do then??? Yes let's get into the matter properly. Lemme tackle the attacks I know will definitely come "But a relationship is not always all about sex SugarKing". But before you say that, I need you to step back and analyse that your statement PROPERLY.



What do mean sef??? A relationship is all about SEX goddammnit!!! Sex, is were the BOND is at!!! This is why no matter how 2 people say their they're in a strictly sex-buddy relationship, something special is born when they first have sex and grows with the more sex they have. It brings souls together in ways the mind could never understand. There is a connection between your psyches. You WANT to be having sex with your partner!!! It strengthens the relationship!!!



Wait, so there's no physical contact is what you're telling me? No cuddles? No kissing????? because these all lead to sex, so if you're saying there's no sex, it means you guys are avoiding these things.......and what is that?


Chelu, what do you people do? Take romantic bus rides round the city? Go to the park? Oh, I won't even ask about the cinema, Even our dog know say that one follow.



Well, I haven't met, and don't know of any men, who'd actually be the ones coming with the "No Sex" clause, hence I shall now address the ladies. loool. So my questions are; Why do you want a boyfriend when you're not ready to have sex? ladies always like to go and say "Men are such dogs, they'll go after anything in a skirt" and I say to that, "BEFORE NKO????" If you have to blame anybody, blame our creator. Yes I said it! he put those hormones in us. A man catches a glance of bare female flesh, (Notice I said "glance". You glance with your eyes abi?) signals are transmitted through the eyes, through the brain, down the spine (sending tingles, this causes excitement you have no idea about) and land smack in the middle of our Testosterone pool, similar to what happens when a fat person jumps into a small pool. This causes the level to overflow (think conji) and some of the water finds its way into a shaft, fills it, get its up, and that's how we know what time it is - HUNTING SEASON. We couldn't stop this if our lives depended on it, so who are you people blaming really??? lol



And a man, from when he has his first sex, will NEED (emphasis on "need") that sex regularly. I don't want to put any fear into our ladies in distance-relationships, but I'll tell you this, there's only a time frame within which a man CAN go without sex. I'm not saying this to deliberately hurt you, but it is, what it is. I know this, and I know you know this too. Moving on.




Lemme tell you something. A man's attraction to a woman is like a dart board. Sex is right in the middle, and everything else surrounds it. I don't care if he's a priest, and maybe it might not be in the center particularly, but it is in the mix somewhere. I don't know what you people think, but blood flows in our veins you know??? Not iced water, not tea, not even beer, B-L-O-O-D.



And how can you sit there and tell me a relationship mustn't always be about sex? Because what you are equally saying is that, it doesn't matter if I go get it somewhere else abi? Oh, you won't have that now would you? How about I go outside and get it, come back to you like "mehhhnnnn, the girl last night was the BOOOOMMMMBBBBB!!!! Shiiiiiiiittttttt! We did the doggy, standing doggy, lying-down doggy (chai, I love this one sha!) Monkey style, cockroach, caterpillar" and you go "Awww, hunni I'm glad you had fun!" and kiss you on the lips? yeah, how about that??



But then you're a smart, beautiful, intelligent, wise (lol), got-it-going-on lady, why would you want that?? So why would you put your man through that? Because you're torturing the man is what you're doing. You know that right? What do what do you think you're doing starving the man? Because I know that nigga want's to have sex. Nothing you fit tell me. If he's okay with a no-sex relationship, take this from me, you need to check that brother. And if you really love him, does he really deserve that? Because men, all we need to cheat is a go-ahead from you that its ok. I tell you, no man ever cheats without an excuse. I will catch heat for this, but I'll stand by my words here. It is always something. I don't know him so I don't know what his excuse was, but trust me, there was an excuse. So why would you just hand it on a platter to us and think that we will stop for a fraction of a second to re-consider???



Some men, go into a relationship, because they don't really fancy that whole sleeping all over the place business. They find one lady, take her heart, give her theirs, and the sex becomes the icing on the cake. Get it? The initial plan was to have sex, but he thought, I want it to be meaningful sex. I want to dedicate heart and soul to this person because I know the sex will be way sweeter, my gallivanting friends don't know what they're missing. And you come and say "NO SEX???



In my opinion, if you are not having sex, you have no business having a man. It's not worth it. It's a headache and a pain in the ass rolled in one. I advice to wait till you're ready, Whenever that is. lol

37 comments »

Confidence  

Posted by Sugarking

So I was on the bus again, seated right at the back, going home from work. All the seats were taken and there were quite a few people standing. I was on my phone fiddling, and subconsciously noticed the white guy seated opposite me. A few minutes later, I raised my head and he was gone. It was while I was looking around that I spotted the pair standing right at the very front of the bus. A white guy chatting up a black lady. Wait a minute! That's the white guy that was sitting here a few minutes back, I thought to myself. Omo, I forgot what I was doing on my phone and concentrated on them jare. From the way the girl was acting, there was no mistaking the toasting that was going on. He was standing behind her and was engaging her in conversation. She was replying him, but only with short anwers apparently, as she kept her head turned so she was watching the road, and only turned to answer the man's questions. And bros was un-relenting with the questions too. It was the way she kept flicking her hair back and front to answer him that I found quite intriguing. He said something to her, she flicked her hair back to face him, answered him, flicked it front again to watch the road. She was loving it! And this went on for quite a while. E never tey when my man pulled out his phone, and she flicked her hair a couple of times again to recite her number!!!!! What????!!!!!! I was petrified!!!!! Right in front of the bus!!! And you know everyone else behind was facing front, so they saw all that encounter willingly or un-willingly! They both happened to get off at the same place where the man continued his toasting.



I've always argued with ladies who couldn't stop with that "I like Confidence in a guy" yarns. I mean, A guy could have sniffed a whole tank of Coke, smoked all the weed in the world, drank all the alcohol, put his hands in my pockets, slide over to you like "Hey baby, wassup?" and pass the confidence test right? But everything became clear when after watching this couple. That babe had probably not had even an old wrinkled man pay her any attention since 2011 began. (I'm just saying o. lol) Even still, She could have brushed him off rudely (like most women tend to do. Yes I said it. Na lie before?) But No, homie, spotted her all the way from the back of the bus where he was sitting, got up and went to the very front of the bus, to chat her up! In full view of everyone else!!! I could see why she gave him her number! That's some real confidence right there!!! And it didn't matter that homie was white or whatever, she definitely was impressed with him!!! I mean there were other black brothers together with me on the bus. We get mind why we no waka meet am? Abi she suppose beg us ni? lol


This is the same thing I'm starting to apply in my job hunt. This recession is the reason recruiters are not hiring anymore. It doesn't matter the first class you graduated with. Everyone's in the same soup pot these days. But something that sets a person away from the pack is confidence. A can-do attitude. My dad used to say something back then "If you can't dazzle them with your brilliance, baffle them with your bullshit". I.e, you don't know jack about the job, but your manner of speaking, the confidence in your tone, your expressions just blocks out all your other inadequacies. I've got a Jamaican guy working with me. This guy can chat up a tree I swear. I mean, he can actually start a convo with a tree and get it to talk back to him. this guy calls the customer service personnel at his mobile phone provider and if you've called those people before, you know they can be very curt. They're well mannered, but they are trained to help you resolve your issue in a quick manner and get on to other callers. My jamo guy calls a customer service operator to complain about something on his phone and by the end of the call, the operator has told him what they do, their music tastes, the best restaurants, e.t.c you just name it. When faced with a problem, their replies are usually "Never say never, Sure, Piece of cake, easy, e.t.c"


And this is the same thing recruiters listen for when they first call you to talk about how they found your CV on some site and how they think you might be a good match for the job. Most of the time they're calls usually wake me up in the mornings, and you know how I'm going to sound at that time right? Everyone loves a happy person. Someone who's excited at the littlest things.

We should all strive to be more confident.

30 comments »

Female Worship  

Posted by Sugarking

*WARNING! DO NOT INTEND TO BE COCKY IN THIS POST*


So you know, I was just sitting on the net the other night, smoking...you know, and I thought, I do have a lot of female friends who real just find it comforting to just hold a conversation with me. I repeat I'm not being cocky here, it is simply the truth. Like, phone calls, bbm's, Facebook chat e.t.c, We can go for hours talking about everything, but talking about nothing in particular. And I realised with rude shock that the key to having a lot of women "satisfied" with you is not necessarily your swag, or the way you carry fine, or your six pack and all that rubbish, it is simply by female worship! Women love, scratch that, women LIVE!!! to be worshipped!!! from the second they are born, and mom starts to dress them in pink and all, they are groomed to be worshipped.


3 year old Mary is dressed for her birthday party and everyone that comes to wish her happy birthday goes, "Ah, Mary your hair is fine o!", "Mary, your dress is lovely!!!" that carries on when she reaches puberty. That sexy, sly guy goes " You know, Mary I ain't trying to be rude, but you've got a great future behind you" and she goes "Aww, thanks. kiss kiss". She gets married, has kids and little junior after a meal goes "Mommy this soup is wicked!!", her daughter tells her just before she leaves for church "Mummy, you look like take-away". She gets old and starts greying and people say to her, "Ah, mama instead of ageing you're looking like under 16", "Mama's greying so beautifully, its unbelievable".


Women Live to be worshipped. By worship I don't mean you have to lie and tell a fat girl that she's thin o!, or a midget that she's tall e.t.c o!. No, they can hear your lie even before it comes out trust me. You have to be able to be so real and honest to get a way with it clean. You have to know how to mix a some flattery with a some real facts perfectly. And this takes skill. This will have them throwing their panties at you with reckless abandon. Like "Baby, I'm a virgin, but you can have me....no....I'm not joking, I mean it" loooool.


And by worship, I do not absolutely mean the flirty "You've got some nice lips" "You're sexy", "I love your dimples", or smile or dentition e.t.c. It could even come from a church leader sef. A simple "If you must know, I believe in you more than you believe in yourself Mary. This is not the first exam you're writing in your life. I know you've studied hard, just go in that day, do your best and leave the rest to God ok? I don't doubt that you'll pass more than you expected just watch". You can't fail with that. She be stone? looooool


But I'm not saying the ultimate goal is to enter babylon o, I mean just having you on speed dial on their phones, you being the first chill-with buddy that comes to their minds, and other similar things is exactly what I'm talking about. I was saying to a chic the other day that I'm trying to work on being humble and she burst into hysterical laughter "But you ARE humble Nkem, what are you talking about?" she said. Even with my twin, people know he can be a bit hot headed and confrontational, but that I'm the one to go to, to "reason" with. I have a great "Listening" ear, I'm very proud to say. I put in work in that department, so allow me to brag a little.


People generally love a person they can say anything to. As in no topics are off limits with them. They wanna talk dirty, its you. They wanna just have a laugh and some banter after a very bad day, its you. In some cases, you are the surest booty call sef. looool. That is, You are the "There" guy. I love being the goto guy jare. Not for everything I mentioned sha o. Hahaa! So I have always persevered to push my humility to it's limits. I said to @chayaoma the other day "my humbleness (if there's ever a word) is the only thing I'm cocky about. And I do it effortlessly. And most importantly it helps me to feel better with myself as a person, which is really a good thing in itself. Its really not as difficult as it seems. Some people really need to try it sometimes.


Women love to be worshipped. Mix some of that with a little flattery, a little truths, a little humility sprinkled with some "reaslistic-ness", and you'll have them spell-bound every other time that you speak, every step you take my brother. Now go forth and conquer!!! loool"


Women if I'm lying, just take a while to rank your male friends from top down and see if it isn't the humble types that top the list.
lol

Abeg ladies make una no vex for me o, I have been smoking sha. looooool

20 comments »

The Girl from the Pub 2  

Posted by Sugarking

....So You remember Aisha from the last post abi? and How we exchanged pins when we got off the bus abi? Yeah, so I pinged her a couple of times A week passed and I didn't get any replies. Then I remembered she said she was regular at my pub for lunch, so I thought to check with the bar staff if they'd seen her lately. So I opened Aisha's bb display pic and showed to Shenika (one of the bar staff girls). Shenika's reaction startled me. "hahahaaaa! How'd her picture get on your phone??!! No, I mean how'd you get her picture??" she asked further. I was confused now. In short she left me standing there and ran to tell another of the bar staff girls that I had a pic of "That Lady that always drinks red wine when she comes around". And that is when they both gave me "Aisha's" full gist.



In short these too didn't mince words "She's a prostitute Sugarking" they chorused. They said she was always regular there, always only ordered a tall glass of red wine and always left drunk. That wasn't their problem they admitted but it was the fact that she always came in with a guy, each one different from the last! Dem laugh me no be small. They said she had even tried to come onto "Steve" also a bar staff who didn't pay her any attention as he was gay. She had also tried to move to Penny's man friend (another bar staff). Penny made me promise to have three condoms on if I must do anything with her sef. lol. Then I started to correlate the Bar staff stories with what Aisha herself had said. She said she was a "social worker", freelancing in about 5 different parts of the town, and liked to meet her "clients" for lunch at my pub.....Makes sense??? lol


Anyways, it wasn't long before I met her at the pub again. I had just finished my shift and was chilling by the bar with a beer the manager had bought me. "hey!!!! how are you???!!" she said, and she had two men with her this time. I replied that I was great, she started to apologise for not pinging me as she had actually lost her bb that first night we met. She had some very mai mai phone for a replacement too. haha. Anyways she asked if I was going back home and that she was going that way so If I could please wait for her to finish her drink with her "clients" would be great. I said "cool". We where soon out of the pub on our way to the bus stop. What's funny is how all the bar staff that day noticed us walking out together and I became gist o.


So we got on the bus, she proceeded to the top deck of the bus and I followed her sha. We took seats right in front of the bus. This was bad mehn! Aisha was drunk, smelling and talking at the top of her voice. There was no denying the audience we had behind us. It took me all the energy I could muster to not go down and kick the driver to move faster. Meanwhile I obliged Aisha the conversation I could manage. She actually did 99% of the talking in my opinion. I was all "hmm, right, OK" e.t.c She was slurring so bad in her speech it was unbelievable.


I was glad when we finally got to our stop. But that was just the beginning of my woes actually. I climbed down the steps to the lower deck and stepped out and turned just in time to see Aisha falling off the bus!!! As in she was all fours on the cold pavement!!! I was flabbergasted! I had a strong mind to just walk away mehn! Shey you see me? I hate to be involved in public shows of any kind. I flee from it. You can curse me and my life, and i'll just jejely walk away. She fell off the bus. Chai! I was soooo embarrassed! I quickly looked up and down the road and thankfully there wasn't a lot off people watching. Even the bus driver thought he had run her over or something and had to wait a while to make certain she was well clear of the bus before moving off. And she didn't even get up immediately, she just lay there wimping. I took her by the arm and tried to lift her up but she chose to sit there on the pavement and wimp some more. I prayed with my last breath that she didn't fracture anything. I wasn't about to start carrying anybody anywhere. Thankfully she was able to stand and walk. And that's what we did till we went our separate ways with her all apologetic for "embarassing" me she said. I brushed it off as nothing though but was all too glad to be rid of her, her pin and every other thing associated with her. I don't know what it was, but she wasn't the same in my eyes again jare

I got to work next day and everyone had some big grins on their faces like "so was she any good?" "No she wasn't!" I replied "She didn't even step foot in my house!"


Yeah so there goes Aisha jare. lol

22 comments »

The Girl from the Pub  

Posted by Sugarking

Work was hectic today mehn. I don't normally work Fridays, but they had me in at the pub today because they were hosting a couple of Christmas parties, you know, families go out to a pub or somewhere nice to have dinner or whatever. So I took a break to go get some drinking water. To do that, you had to go from the kitchen, right behind the bar and round the corner to where the dispenser was. So I was there drinking my water surveying the customers that where there when I noticed this rather pretty girl. Dark skinned and having that exotic skin tone normally associated with Somalians sitting at the bar, a white guy chatting her up. She was responding nicely though so I thought perhaps they had come together.




Anyways, I finished my drink and passed by them again, making sure to take a proper glance this time. Nah, they were carried away in their convo to even notice me. Well, thirty minutes later, I had finished work, gotten dressed and made my way to the bus stop when I noticed a girl crossing the road to the same bus stop, who had gotten there just before me, turned and smiled at me. Ah, me sef smiled back na. My mind like, "ehen? she smiled so what??. You want to embarrass yourself now abi?" So me sef kpem, but I made sure no to go far. Feeding her the green light if I may put it that way. If she really had intentions, she would definitely accept my....em.....light. (hehe)


She lit a cigarette, turned, caught my eye, smiled again and said "You alright?". Ahhhhhh!! Unbelievable!!! So she really did have intentions!!! So I replied that I was fine o and she continued "Didn't you just come from the pub?? You work there??" WOOOOWWW!!! So she saw me??!!! And I thought she didn't notice!!!! I replied that I infact did, "Didn't I see you with the white guy??" You know na, make bobos know kwa o! I've seen many a brother make the newspaper, the cause of death being a jealous lover. I won't be in the papers for that o!!! She then went on to narrate how she had gone there to meet a friend who hadn't yet come, and the white guy was just there chatting shit to her, as she put it. So she said she was actually going my way, to another pub "Weatherspoons". Ah, me sef confirmed that I knew the place. Our bus soon arrived, we climbed on the top deck, found a pair of seats and settled down to chop talkey.


I was quite impressed to be honest. Her name was/is Aisha, and she's a care worker supporting poor kids and all, is a free lance beautician with plans already in motion to get her own salon. I was impressed really. So it was a hearty discussion sha, when we got to Weatherspoons, we both got down, I pointed the place out to her and I was just saying good bye when she interrupted, "So you want me to keep in touch, call you, or....." That was when I gave myself a very clean, dirty slap. "Na dream I dey so??, oya Sugarking wake up! You are stupid for dreaming that kind of dream!" But this was real! She sef come look me one kind and I returned "Nah, it was a fly". We exchanged pins and said our good byes.


Don't get me wrong o, I know some people might read my back posts and refer from all the ones I've been posting lately that I have no game. lol. Far from that, my game is very much intact, and I'm not even bragging yet. hehe. I just don't like to show myself. Plus I cherish my self respect badly! But It was a bit shocking na, ahn ahn! I see one fine babe for pub who apparently didn't even have time to notice me, then 30 mins later, I have the very babe's name, bio, and bb pin?? lol. No but make una sef check am na ehn???


p.s. I'm a good boy. That I took her pin is exactly what it is, I took her pin. It doesn't mean anything will happen. No I am not Emeka. LMAO!!!

19 comments »

The fascination of sex  

Posted by Sugarking


But today we are debating the fascination and attraction of sex to both men and women. What is sex sef? The man puts his member into the female, thrusts for a while, cums and its over. I mean it is just a phallus and a hole coming together, what’s the big deal??? Why is the whole of humanity ruled by the god SEX??? Men chase it like their lives depends on it. At the clubs, on the road, even in church we are hunting! Even the women are not spared. No! No! No! They are equally as guilty. Babes are braving rainstorms these days on okada racing to the arms of their lovers. Their motto: “I can’t sleep alone this night please”. My brother used to have a girl cross the country to him just to take pipe!


I mean just think about it, and this has been since humanity began o. The “Kpekus” (vagina) has been the cause of wars numerous to mention. Just think “the battle of Troy”. Me sef sometimes whenever, morning afternoon or evening, when I want it, it’s just what it is, I WANT IT. It starts with a tossing and turning, that’s when I know I have to get it out. No seriously, there’s no way I’m keeping it in me any longer. Some of us start calling from booty call 1 till infinity, till one answers. Please note that this applies to women too o!!!


Worse comes to worst the men make do with Suzie Palms and the women with Trey fingas. And have you ever noticed how you always admit to yourself that sex is over rated just right immediately after cumming??? Abi is this just me? And that’s only when you can go back to other things? But for me sef, it only takes about 10 mins after and Aunty Konji is back from the market. And the entire cycle repeats its self a billion times over in every one of us for the rest of our lives, the first day being the first time our members joined forces with another member.


P.s. I was high when I wrote this. Forgive me please

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